Poet Authority Poem Terminal

The blade tumbled toward his feet.

Life flashing before his eyes.

His reflexes,

Aided by the imprecise tumbling of the knife,

Saved the day.

Mack was fine.

Though he never stopped thinking about the moment.

And would tell the story to any willing to listen.

Moved in with the local owls.

They came to accept his presence.

Asked him to look after their eggs.

Probably.

He couldn't be sure because he didn't speak their language.

But it seemed like the polite thing to do.

So he forged ahead.

Frank became jealous.

He hated being less successful than his cat.

He quit his job.

Sat there depressed.

Trying to thinking of things he could do to become a meme too.

Pauline's new hobby was scrolling through giant lists of movies,

Spending an evening trying to decide what to watch,

And then going to sleep.

She loved it!

She invited her friends over.

Encouraged them to join in.

They couldn't quite grasp the concept.

Kept trying to press play on Grease.

Carly requested one scoop of stracciatella.

She observed the person in the dopey hat,

Slowly hovering towards her choice.

He plunged his spoon thing into the chilled substance.

And resurfaced with a thimble.

Carly slapped her car keys on the counter,

Grabbed the offering,

And trudged off.

Contemplating the price of this stuff.

Flint had forgotten how to count.

He felt the pressure mounting.

His opponent's judging stare.

He considered packing the whole thing in.

Flipping over the table.

And watching the little coloured discs scatter over his opponent.

Kevin bought a basketball hoop,

And a basketball.

And looked forward to owning a house to bolt it to.

He hoped to grow a foot taller too.

That might help with the new aspirations.

His mouth had to be scrubbed,

Manually.

It felt sad.

He felt sad.

He made a note of this event in his diary.

Imagined his grandchildren reading it one day.

Their tears splattering the pages.

And then he remembered movies exist.

He put one of those on instead.

Gave his book a new life as a coaster.

He told his wife about this.

He told her the flavours too.

And he told her that in America they call crisps chips.

Which he felt added a little culture to the conversation

She nodded.

He had to apologise for all of the things he'd typed into it.

And all of the things he'd made it look at.

The computer would look irritated every time Bill wanted to check his emails too.

And occasionally glance down at that little clock in the bottom of its screen.

'How am I supposed to have guests without podcasts'

He pondered aloud into the void where a microphone could be.

If he was still around.

And Charlie Dimmock,

If she was still around.

He imagined how people would be talking about it.

About David getting his ear pierced.

And how he would go out and buy earrings.

He hung it in his living room,

And stared at it for a while.

Wishing he'd bought a TV instead.

He began chasing it down the street.

On this journey the sun on his dome.

It felt glorious.

Dotty's pace dropped.

He plopped himself on the nearby grass.

Watched as his wig vanished into the distance.

Leaned back,

Unbuttoned his shirt,

And took selfies with his glistening scalp.

He massaged it,

Told it how much he loved it.

And wondered how much more money he'd have to invest in sunscreen.

He stuck pins in the thing,

And it caused him pain!

He apologised to his ex.

Told her she was probably right.

Jasper's birthday arrived.

He wore his special birthday hat.

Gestured toward it during conversation.

Some polite smiles and nods returned.

The hottest sun of them all.

He equipped a shovel,

Dug them up,

And threw them in his pond.

'Fucking figure it out for yourself then!'

He screamed at some petunias.

His neighbours were shocked.

They tried to cover their daughter's ears.

But it was already too late.

He likes eating off the floor too.

It had somehow accumulated more objects than she knew existed.

She added a bike to the stack and went back indoors.