Showing posts from February, 2024


I got on one of those planes.
Which, if you're a bit lost,
Is like a bus with wings.
I went about my business.
Largely sitting on a plane for a few hours,
And waiting for some guy to offer me a cup of water.
Eventually I arrived in a new country.

New Ideas

Jeremy started driving on the pavement.
All of the traffic was diving out of his way,
And cheering him on.
He couldn't believe no one else had thought of this.


Herbie liked talking about his printer.
For over a decade,
Anyone who'd listen,
And even some who wouldn't,
Got to hear about how poorly this thing functioned.

Sewer Smells

Grant's life devolved.
Which is to say he went to live in a sewer.
The smells of this new home were not to his liking.
Candles became an obsession.
Scented ones, vanilla mostly.
All of Grant's money was being bundled into these things.
They did little to resolve the situation.
And cost more than the rent at his previous place, probably.


I looked up at the sky.
Largely blue.
Some clouds were going about their day.
Barely forming any worthwhile shapes.
Beyond the usual cloudy looking things.
I looked down at my poet's notepad.
And my poet's pen.
Really disappointed with the stuff they were coming out with.


I found myself on a bus.
It was interesting to say the least.
All sorts on here with me.
With their things going on.


Max was sitting there.
Wishing the fart went as planned.
Wondering how long he had to linger before making his excuses.


A little mouse,
Enjoyed cheese.
He also enjoyed evading traps.
And living in a house.
His life was absolutely ideal.


Mark grew a beard,
And started stealing toys from children,
To ruin Santa's reputation.


Beryl bought a cottage,
And a cottage pie.
She ate the cottage pie,
In the cottage.
Went on Twitter to let the world know.
Some people call that X these days.
The people there didn't care,
Because they were all busy being racist, 
Or whatever it is people do on Twitter these days.


An athlete won!
But he was shy.
So his mum had to go up and collect his prize.
But she lacked the winner's humility.
So she was hurling inappropriate language at the other athletes,
And sticking her fingers up at them.


Frank went out and bought a clown costume.
Mostly to take the edge off some of the insults at work.
Being called a clown, specifically.
It didn't help so much with the others.