Two Pats

Pat

A woman

And Pat

A man

Got muddled and started going to each other's arrangements.

So Pat was going to football practice

And Pat was getting his nails done

And everyone was fine with that.

(Apart from Pat's manicurist who was appalled by the state of his nails and the amount of work it took to get them in shape, and she'd had enough of hearing stats for the Premier League's top players)