Beefy extended his novelty fork the full two metres and hooked a slab of meat off the barbecue.
He glanced over the cow and prepared for the big count.
There was Chopsy, Hunk, Nugget, Mincer, Leggers, and of course his very own Beefy.
Six! Beefy sighed with relief, the barbecue was in accordance with government guidelines and he was perfectly safe.
"Wait a minute, who the hell is that?!" Beefy extended his fork at the mystery person.
The stranger gnawed a gob of meat off Beefy's slab and gave him a little wink.
The meat oozed down the stranger's tracksuit and misted up his Ray-Bans.