Poet Authority Poem Terminal

He offered it with a sly wink.

He couldn't wait.

He climbed into the oven and started eating them.

Some of them were still frozen and he was uncomfortably hot.

Then he mashed them up and poured milk over them.

Then he ate them.

He offered comments on loose screws around the house.

As she unwrapped her gift.

He argued with a zoo keeper for several hours.

Lawrence eventually accepted that even if he was allowed to buy one,

He wouldn't have enough space in his flat,

And left disappointed.

An attractive woman approached and asked if he was OK.

He told her his tears were of joy, and that he loved his new necklace ever so much.

She nodded and left.

Wally went back to full on panic mode.

After months of work,

An artist finished a painting of her husband.

She sat him down,

Unveiled the creation.

Horrified he requested a divorce.

The artist cried,

Funnelled the pain into her art.

This improved it quite a bit.

So they got back together.

Hamley sat at an upstairs window.

Watching as his neighbour cut their grass.

He felt them judging the length of his own.

He was furious.

He scrubbed out the plan to mow it this week.

Tentatively marked it down for a couple of months from now.

Steve grew tired of life.

It was time to start doing what he wanted to do.

Which was quit his job.

So he quit his job.

Now he was at a loss.

Ian told her not to worry,

He loves her enough to cover both of them.

The disagreement continued.

Couldn't believe his luck.

A trifold.

Yes please!

He picked up another.

He set an alarm for the year 2030.

Sat back and imagined roaming the aisles.

A goat

Boarded a boat

With another goat.

'Well, one of you will have to leave'

Said Noah.

Gesturing towards a goat already on deck.

A knight napped on the battlefield.

His shield became a blanket.

Other knights demanded he get up.

They had a job to do.

'I'm cosy!'

He replied.

Pulling his shield over his helmet.

He began to feel self-conscious about the choice.

He massaged his trouser legs.

Attempting to make them fall closer to his shoes.

Past tense, but it's currently happening.

I waited for the day to pass.

So I could go where I wanted to be.

In bed.

But not too early

An acceptable time for a person of my age.

I felt haunted by grandma.

Dead now, so that works.

She always spoke fondly of bed time.

It was what she spent her days looking forward to.

Being awake seemed like an inconvenience.

I felt my future sloshing over me.

It's the sort of thing Noel had seen on television.

Hiding in wardrobes.

He contemplated leaving.

Cutting his losses.

But so much time had been invested.

So many plans cancelled.

Maybe another day would bear fruit.

He loaded up some AI and requested it tell him to cheer up.

Then he asked the AI how he felt.

His AI told him he probably felt better.

Which was good enough for Marcus.

He consumed his toast.

He stared at the plate where the toast once sat.

One man shook another man's hand firmly.

The other man's grip was firmer still. 

The first man thought about this for the rest of the day.