Poet Authority Poem Terminal

An astronaut couldn't find the keys to his spaceship.
NASA's science people were so focused on counting down they didn't notice him trying to pry the door open.
They got to zero and there he was, still standing on the platform.
Fully decked out in his spacefaring gear too.
It looked set to be a humiliating trudge back to the office.

I furnished myself with a lab coat and science goggles
Filled my science pocket with scientific pens
And got to work with my experiments
Test tubes fizzed and lumps of flesh groaned
Finally I grew myself a beast
I named him Frankenstein
I hoped that would shut people up

An astronaut was encountering so many aliens he had to start giving them all nicknames
There was beaky, slaphead, tubs, fatso, and lardarse
He was pleased so many aliens were rotund, it helped with his lack of imagination
The astronaut thought it was hilarious
That was until the aliens started learning English
He noticed they were beginning to treat him differently at monthly meet ups and things

An astronaut filled his boots with sand and stashed a very long hose pipe in his spaceship.
He wasn't too keen on the idea of floating around in space and had concerns about the air quality.
He was pretty hopeful this plan would pan out.

The scientist started making up new words.
It seemed to be paying off.
The other scientists were too embarrassed to question them.

He rolled up his trousers.
Couldn't believe he didn't think of this sooner, it was like a pair of shorts!
His shins felt glacial.
Hairs froze and began to snap off in the high winds.
He shivered and wished he came up with this idea during the summer.

Luke Skywalker's lightsaber wouldn't power on.
This disaster was occurring in front of the whole class.
Had Princess Leia stolen the batteries again?
Luke was finding the whole situation rather awkward.