Poet Authority Poem Terminal

Some guy thought he'd make a good cowboy. He got in touch with the local gang. This was before he remembered being terrified of horses. He wasn't fond of shooting people either. And he thought he looked bad in a hat. He really started to regret the decision.

Boris Johnson

Ruffled his hair

Before appearing on television

Fast car

Goes zoom

Standing on the Great Wall of China

A poet surveys its surroundings

Scouting for inspiration

There are a lot of people around

It's very distracting

A man was sick to death of noodles

It's all his partner would make

'Shove your noodles up your arse' he shouted at the young girl

He swerved and continued on

Spitting out the water that went in his mouth

Her mother was unimpressed

Our eyes
See things
Because our hearts
Couldn't cope

A man gazes upon his shins

He's rather fond of them

What a lovely pair

They make for nice connectors too

Between the ankles and the knees

Yes life would be a bit of a drag

For a man without his shins

Trailer filled with food

To keep us alive

Attached to a truck

Destroying the world

Boats bob in the water

Reflections of boats can be seen in the water

A person stands on one of the boats bobbing in the water

They vomit over the side of the boat bobbing in the water

The vomit floats away from the boat in the water

God turns up the heat

To melt the chocolate

That blocks the cave

In which Jesus resides

Chocolate coated feet

People bow to eat

Because they're way into

That sort of thing

Duck swims

Goes quack

Batman forgot where he parked his Batmobile.
Two-Face was getting away!
Robin wouldn't stop complaining.
Batman had promised him ice cream,
After they caught Two-Face.

'Wow look at that!
Three pens
One for each hand!'
He didn't have three hands
'And a spare'

'What's that?'

He spotted a magnifying glass on the desk

'I really shouldn't

These letters are large enough already'

He wasn't sure he could handle them any bigger

His lips cracked into a smile

He recalled the time he clicked things while word processing and had to call his grandson over to fix it

He was going to cook dinner for his wife

Hoping to slip in a finger

Just the little one though

He didn't use it very often so he thought it would be OK

He was excited to see his wife's reaction when he told her what she just ate

One hundred poems in one hundred days

That seems like cause for a celebration

For it is so many days

And so many poems

And the person who wrote them must be brilliant

But how should one celebrate

With a poem of course

Otherwise it wouldn't be

One hundred poems in one hundred days

The forklift operator loved his job so much
Sometimes he would put boxes in the wrong place just so he could lift them again
This irritated his boss but she couldn't bring herself to fire him
Not with that joyous expression on his face

He tried to squeeze through the gap.
He forgot all about his bones.
He was never going to get through with those in the way.

Two old women

Stand beneath a tree

Talking to each other

They say nothing worth repeating